Archive for September 4th, 2015

4th September
2015
written by Adam

Along the French Riviera a group of notorious crime lords have been running the show for about 15 years. But, when prostitutes Anna, Gina, Maria, and Qiao (Loan Chabanol, Gabriella Wright, Tatiana Pajkovic, and Wenxia Yu) are pushed to their final breaking point, destroying the empire and self extraction is the goal. Of course, it’ll take the help of a Transporter (Frank Martin) to really stay untangled and free. What are the odds this will go well? Slim. transporterre Written by a committee of five and directed by Camille Delamarre this poorly plotted excuse of an Audi commercial laughably goes through the motions of an action flick sans the sharp choreography, cinematography, and quality editing to really sell the spectacle. Mercifully the film clocks in at 96 minutes which will leave plenty of time to hit the bars and slug down a few stiff drinks to forget what travesty you’ve just witnessed. Pass all round, The Transporter Refueled is rated PG-13.

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4th September
2015
written by Adam

Seeking to reconnect with his homeland, Author and adventurer Bill Bryson (Robert Redford) decides to take on the seemingly impossible Appalachian Trail. Accompanied by salty and out of shape acquaintance Stephen Katz (Nick Nolte) the two set out to conquer mountains, fields, and streams. Finding out what’s important in life will come from lessons on the trail, but, it’s how the lessons manifest themselves that just might break these two.woodsy Based loosely on the book by Bill Bryson this breezy romp through the woods contains tones of “Wild” mixing with “Grumpy Old Men;” fun, but sadly never reaching a genuine richness and instead relies heavily on intentional omission of detail, implying depth, but not actually giving clarity. As for story arc, that’s a tough non-Euclidian shape to fathom this go round, rather a straight line seems to be the outcome. But, for folks looking to spend some time with a few warm hearted old men grumbling about their ailments in the forest, you could do a lot worse. Plus, Nolte’s voice has developed into the perfect mix minus gravel, vocal cords surely steeped in fine oak barrels from the cellar’s of kings, and that in and of itself is a treat. Probably best enjoyed on the Lifetime channel later, A Walk in the Woods is rated R.

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