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Cade Yeager (Mark Wahlberg) is an inventor, tinkerer, robotics specialist, and a father to Tessa Yeager (Nicola Peltz). With Tessa about to head off to college, Cade finds himself struggling to make ends meet. To pay for school and save the farm he needs one great invention to cash in on; levraging his debt and picking antiques Cade stumbles upon a Transformer that’s been in hiding since the last time Transformers were seen on earth by the public, some years ago in Chicago. It would seem that the U.S. government has been deploying CIA Black Ops teams to rid the earth of Transformers. But where are the remaining parts taken and for what purpose, Inventor Joshua Joyce (Stanley Tucci) has answers. But it’s all dirty politics, who’s paying who, who’s pulling the real strings, what does this mean for earth’s future, and who is this mysterious transformer known as Lockdown? Cade, Tessa, and boyfriend Shane (Jack Reynor) will have to save the day. Autobots Roll Out! Written by Ehren Kruger and Directed by Michael Bay, the film serves as a technical marvel, well executed effects, IMAX cinematography, big explosions, and then even bigger effects, so there’s that. However, as Bay returns to the well for creativity and inspiration it’s clear the well is bone dry, probably has been for several years. For all of its flashy flashy, the audience doesn’t see anything new or groundbreaking, instead the audience gets quite possibly one of the worst hack and whack screenplays for 2014, try and track what’s going on for the first hour without asking “What is going on here?” Then, as if the lack of cohesive storyline wasn’t enough, how about the schizoid character development? While our leads are doing their best to make sausage from roadkill, the utter stupidity of the writing sinks lower with mindless exposition to explain everything at every turn and every development, and, the Transformers themselves still come across for the most part as bad caricatures of washed up stereotypes. Twisting the knife further Bay leaves us with a runtime of 165 minutes, as the adage goes, a film that’s getting longer without getting better is getting worse– this film is no exception. I cannot in good conscience support this endeavor, pick a different film to watch this weekend, any film, any film but this one. Transformers: Age of Extinction is rated PG-13.